YES!

yes
I’ve been blogging through the month on the topic of unschooling, or organic learning. Today we focus on the letter Y, say “YES!”

It’s so easy for parents to get stuck in a rut of No.  When we can make a shift in our mindset and begin to say Yes, our world can change. As a part of the deschooling process, we can open our mind to new ways of doing things. If we can just take a moment of pause before replying, and consider the option of Yes.

Parents are the ambassadors for their children in this world. We would love to open up every possibility for them. When we say Yes, this can begin to happen.  If we can’t make something happen for them, we can help them get one step closer. A big aha! moment for me was after Ian died, I didn’t have a schedule to follow, I had no guidelines tying me to anything. I began to say Yes more often, and was open to more opportunities and adventures around me. I tried new things like Zumba and tested my skills at Paddle boarding. I didn’t leave the party early to get home for bedtime, we stayed and we enjoyed ourselves. Sometimes parents say “no” out of habit. When we start to ask ourselves what would happen if I said Yes, we can see new possibilities open up.
There are different ways to say Yes. For example, we went by Target to pick up something this afternoon, Lil’ Z is saving his money to buy the Lego’s Indominous Rex Breakout set. It costs $130. He has been saving his money for quite some time, and he had made it clear that he needs $41. and he will have enough to purchase it. So he picked it up at the store today to show it to me, and he asks if he can get it. I say, “Yes, you are so close to having your money saved up, you should have enough in just a short while.” Then he was so excited about how much he had saved, and was counting down how long it was going to be until he was able have enough.
Another common conversation around here goes like this: “Mom, can we go to the park?” “Yes, I have to finish this work on my computer and make lunch, then we can go.” Yes frames things in a positive light. I am a strict believer that Yes means Yes, and NO means NO. So if I say Yes, I do need to stick to it, and make it happen. However, it doesn’t mean that I live by every whim of my children. We obviously can’t grant every request at that very moment, but we try to make Yes happen as often as possible. A small shift in our mindset can make big things happen.
Have you considered the option of Yes?

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3 thoughts on “YES!”

  1. I love the word “Yes”! It opens up so many opportunities, as you say. I don’t have children, but I like your approach, yes, sometimes followed with a little restriction. My motto in life when trying to achieve or ask for something is “No is what you have, yes is what you could get”, so everything is worth trying! 🙂

    Liesbet @ Roaming About – A Life Less Ordinary

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  2. I was thinking while reading your post, that for me, the word was no. I have to say to myself:

    “No. My ADHD kid does not NEED structure, a schedule or a routine.”
    “No. My kids will not do early college. Who needs to rush.”
    “No. It is not wrong for you to go a month without formal academics.”
    “No, he does not need to do a worksheet for math.”
    “No, you cannot join that controlling co-op.”
    “No, I am not a bad mom.”
    “No. I am not ruining my kids.”

    After saying these things awhile, I started saying the yes:

    “Yes! He learned to cound, add and subtract. I didn’t even start teaching him that yet! It is working! That is crazy!”

    “Yes! He won’t stop reading. Who ever would have believed that by not telling him to read, that he’d figure out on his own that books rock!”

    “You guys take volunteers here? Awesome! Sure. We’re in. We have nothing on our schedule. It is open. We’s love to do that.”

    “Spontaneous field trip. No problem. We are open and free. Nothing scheduled.”

    “Spontaneous birthday party? Yeah, No problem. We’re in!”

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